This week in RATE THAT SIN!

Sure - we recognize the above list as sins.  But periodically, I like to request that you, my gentle homeys, help me rate some of the less easily categorized transgressions.  Ponder with me, once again, to determine if this is a sin? And if so, is it

Totally Telestial

Somewhat Satanic

or should I be

Auf-ed to Outer Darkness?

So - riddle me this? Is it a sin to have a potty word in your favorite exercise song if you really REALLY run faster to that song and you somewhat consider that, well, a spiritual experience? Does anything change *if* you find yourself, when in extreme shin pain, turning your iPod up louder to better hear the angry potty words and then, uhh, smiling?

Mama's handy tip of the day

If you purchase a new brasierre to better support you during workouts....

And if, saaaaaaay, the undergarment is not offering the anticipated benefits and, in fact, rather hurts when you move more than one inch in any direction...

Then....it is a worthwhile endeavor to check and see if said undergarment is on, uhhhh, inside out. Because you might have just really hurt yourself for nothing.

Additionally, I'd advise one to check on the inside-out-status of the support item before spending, let's see, most of the entire day flinching in pain at movements even as small as a yawn or, well, the raise of an eyebrow.  Really - just check it out.  

I'm just saying. You'll thank me later for that handy tip, homeys.

Sing it with me!

Oh-oh-oooooooh
Muffin top!

You'll always be - over the band of my jeaaaaaaaans!

Bad old muffin top...

Muffin top Mormon-yyyyyyy

Muffin top Mormon-yyyyyyy-yyyyyy

I can't stand it anymore. I'm losing all the weight I've gained with this calling.  Starting NOW.

Well, actually, starting yesterday, if we're going to be technical about it.

After I cleaned all that dust out of the exercise room, you'd've thought I would have stuck with working out. You'd've been right, too!  But 1.0 kicked me with her boot (oh yes she did!  Anger management classes are clearly in the child's future) and knocked my perfect pedicured tootsie's nail off.

Ergo, no sneakers for this Mormon.

But I tried working out again yesterday and it went well.  I'm fighting shin splints fierce, but while that's a pain, I always perk myself up when I realize I have shin splints because I have seriously great calf muscles that are stronger (and more attractive) than my front-of-the-leg-muscles (whatever those wimps are called.)  I worked on them for a long time (the whats-er-name muscles) and hope to show them who is the boss within a few days.  

I got to my lowest weight of adulthood after I had 3.0 and I'm headed there again, homeys.  I have been so stressed out about everyone in the ward's life dramas, I find myself eating and eating and eating while I worry.  And I was having trouble finding time to work out - it seemed everyone needed a piece of my day.

But things are calming down and I've found an hour a day I can get working out done.

I know I'll never be thin - I love food too much. But I want to feel better.

I'm also back on my strict "No food after 7 pm" rule.  That was a great help last go round, but it's so dang hard.  But it helps keep food out of my choppers for at least 12 hours a day. Most folks' dramas seem to happen at night and they want to talk to their handy dandy Relief Society President, but I'm just going to stay awaaaaay from the Sara Lee during those hours.  

I decided to treat myself to a pedicure for every 2 weeks that I stick with my daily working out. That way I'll have great toes AND a less-jiggly bum.  I gave myself an advance pedi today as incentive. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. 

My goal is to run a 5K within a year from now. I totally have the endurance - it's the flocking shins (those great calves of mine are such a curse!)  I am hoping by announcing my goal here, I will, well, STICK TO IT!  :)  A ton of gals in my ward keep doing triathlons and while I wish I could muster the enthusiasm to join them, I just can't.  I am just not interested in doing that, but I would like to really challenge and stretch myself somehow more physically.  We'll see!

Bye bye Muffin Top

And not from buying fatter jeans...

Not from buying fatter jeaaaaaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaaaaans!

Life is unfair

We all know life is unfair.

This week, I experienced, firsthand, some of the unfairness of it all.

Riddle me this.  Why, if I have ignored the exercise room in our house and  have not set a toe in that puppy in months, is it filled with dust and grime and funk?  

There were dust snakes hanging from the ceiling fan.  I was tempted to just keep it running so no one noticed.  :)

It seems fair that if you've given up using a room in the home, it should stay dust-free and sparkly, does it not?

Just to show that room who is the boss, I'm back to working out. If I am going to have to clean you, I might as well use you.  That's long been my mantra for children, and I'll now apply it to housekeeping. 

Life's a cruel, cruel joke.