See - this Mormon calling thing pays off.

If you are Mormon - you understand the word, "calling" in a different sense than those who work for AT&T.  In our church, a "calling" is a churchy job that you do with no promised recompense or reward (other than heavenly, I hope.)

Mormons expect a lot of their volunteers.  Our church has no paid ministry, and you'd think we'd all be a wreck on Sundays, unable to function well. Instead, we are a streamlined, well-oiled, highly trained machine.  It's amazing to see in action.  Each member does some job and in turn, an entire congregation functions on Sundays - as well as during the week. Volunteers are running Cub Scout packs, playing the organ on Sunday, cleaning meetinghouses, paying church bills, counseling people, teaching folks English and gardening and how to budget. You name it - Mormons probably have a calling for it.  

For the past long while, I've had callings in my church.  I serve others because I feel, in doing so, I am serving the Lord. Poor Lord - I am not always the best servant.  Sometimes, a calling is overwhelming and more often than not, I am ill-equipped to meet the challenges ahead of me. I have been blessed with excellent counselors and friends (and internet pals) who have listened to me, brainstormed with me, and helped me not be an idiot nearly as much as I would otherwise have proven.  Still, I'd say I fail more than half the time.  And I'm not being gracious there - I've had a boat load of failures.  

Often, I think to myself, "Please!  Let me not have to do this anymore so I can focus on other things for a while/so I can be less embarrassed of my shortcomings/so I can take a nap."

By often, I mean

uhhh

usually.  Usually, like, every day.  

Multiple times a day.

Today is a little different though. Today, I am humbled and thankful to have the opportunity to serve in my church.

A year ago today, I sat in a meeting hearing that 3.0 was developmentally delayed, had speech, communication, and comprehension issues, and frankly, she was waaaaay behind on the curvy racetrack that is life.  I had tried multiple times to have her evaluated and had been dismissed. It took a lot of perseverance for me to find someone who would listen to my plea for help with her. I KNEW what kids her age should be doing because I had a calling working with children every Sunday in 8 different congregations. I was with children her age every week for several years - and between training, manuals I'd reviewed, teaching curricula, and raising my own chil'uns, I knew developmentally, 3.0 was a little different.  But it took a lot to find someone to listen.

A year ago today, listening to the suddenly grim prognosis, I sat there thinking, "THIS SUCKS! My kid should have had help sooner - but no one would listen. I don't have time for a kid who has issues because I'm too busy helping everyone else. I don't have time to bathe - much less do therapies!"

If there was ever a time I didn't want a calling - it was then. I wanted to just focus on my family and not serve anyone but 1.0, 2.0, 3.0 - and maybe Mr. Mormon, if I felt like it that day.  :)

But today - a year later, I sat in another meeting hearing how well 3.0 is doing. I left with an excellent IEP that will allow her to have all the services she needs next year...and will allow us to discontinue some she has grown out of already.  I sat there today thinking, "Thank you for my calling!  Thanks for helping me become an expert in little kids.  Thank you for taking my very meager, humble, never-enough-service to others and using it to save my angel from confusion and misery.  Thank you for helping me know how to help my family."

As we serve others - we can only better ourselves and grow.  Even in our mistakes - we learn what to neeeeeeever ever try again (ask my mom about her taking a crazy lady to lunch trying to be a friend. he he heeeee - but see Mom - it was a learning experience - you now know to ignore the crazies.) As I sit here watching 3.0 struggle with making her Christmas card thank you notes and telling me, "Are they gone be so love it?", I know her communication skills still aren't perfect (nor is my thank-you-note-timeliness - but come on - better late than never!) She still doesn't count to 20 or know how to make her letters. She can't conjugate a verb or use a personal pronoun and prepositions bewilder her. 

But I know where she should be headed and what else I can do to help. And I know that when we were down to the wire and I needed help and someone to listen about 3.0's plight and I could find no one, I was blessed in a most surprising way with just the right help I needed.  And I know I will be blessed again.

I am grateful to all the folks who serve me every week - from bringing bread for the sacrament, to making copies to speaking to us on Sunday. I'm especially grateful to the people who provided ME with such excellent early childhood education training and who let me learn and experiment with their children every week. Without that, who knows where we would be today. A big fat thank you to all the nursery workers who needed training from me and to the others who didn't show up week after week - allowing me to become a nursery aficionado!

So I keep on serving. I don't serve that well all the time - but hopefully, I serve enough that others' lives aren't quite so dreary. Because today, as I look at my own life, it's not nearly as dreary as, a year ago, we had expected it to be.  

WOOHOO!

Organizing Visiting Teaching is really...

...just like playing a giant Bejeweled game of people.

Think about it.

If you were ever a Visiting Teaching Coordinator, you know that comment just spoke to your soul.  You're just trying to get three in a row.   But then, one person moves, and suddenly, everything slides down a spot and something goes ka-boom.  And just when you get it all fixed and in place - you level up and start all over.

Dang profound, isn't it?

A (slow) day in the life of a Relief Society President

early-ish am - Roll outta bed and discover your husband will not be going to church today.  Do an (internal) happy dance because this means you have HELP getting kids ready for religion.

9:45 am - Curse that you promised 2.0 you'd curl her hair since Daddy was home and Mama was less-stressed than usual.

10:20 am - Rejoice as you've only had one call (and 3 emails) about church all morning  - and leave to go to church.

10:22 - Re-enter the house for all the things you forgot you have to deliver to folks at church. Smooch 3.0 good-bye again and (further) rejoice that you are minus one kid during Sacrament Meeting!

10:50 - Arrive at church. Immediately become surrounded with people wanting stuff/you/an opinion/an ear.  

10:59 - Apologize to a sister for saying "No" to her before she even got out her question (you could see that hymnal in her paw and suspected no good could come of it.)  Wonder if your menstrual cycle is on its way and know that this sacrament meeting will have greater significance seeing as you are in the midst of the repentance process with Hymnal Sister.  

11:15 am - During the sacrament, consider how you are truly never going to again snap at Hymnal Sister - shudder - and decide to set sights low at the Telestial Kingdom.

11:16 am - While the Sacrament is being passed, commit the children to visiting you in the Telestial Kingdom someday, and when they make a weird face, demand, somewhat hysterically, "Just promise me, OK?!"

11:30-12:05 pm - Watch the Stake President fall asleep during someone's talk and try to convince 1.0 and 2.0 that he is really sleepy from early meetings and they should not mock him. Inside - hysterically laugh and love that someone else is making a big impression for a change! Pray for him that he will not drool and that he wakes up without a start.

12:07 pm - Be saddened that Heavenly Father wasn't able to actualize your prayer and watch the poor Stake President jump to a start when the organ starts up.  Give 1.0 and 2.0 the evil eye so they will not mock him.  

12:15-1:00 pm - Make a fool of self by trying to participate in Gospel Essentials class.....that is now, apparently, in Spanish.  Construct a note to self to let others know there has been a change, or possibly plan on embarrassing an unsuspecting counselor by asking her to attend in your stead.  Think about that long and hard, and decide sometimes things are only really funny in your head.

1:01 pm - Repent again for Hymnal Sister faux pas and wish she could see how funny that was in your head.  Decide to really REALLY try to like her on top of love her.  Make mental list of her great attributes.

1:02 pm - Stop listing attributes and decide to set up the Relief Society Room.

1:10 pm - Round up sisters from the hall and beg them to come into Relief Society.

1:11 pm - Decide not to take offense at rolled eyes.  Assure yourself that sisters get things stuck in their eyes and need to roll them. Pray that their eyes heal.

1:15 pm - Fight counselor to be the one who gets to do the roll for the absentee Secretary. Counselor just got back from vacation - so you get to do the roll.  It's the least she can do for you seeing as your life is vacationless.

1:16 pm - Lose out to her about getting to look in all the Primary classes for Relief Society sisters.  DRAT

1:16-2:00 pm - Finish Relief Society and just love how great everyone is. Warm fuzzies abound.

2:10 pm - Go to Bishop's office to wait for Ward Council.

2:20 pm - Continue waiting. Realize (and smile, slightly) that everyone loves to talk to the Bishop and be grateful he's such a good guy.

2:30 pm - Sigh loudly and be glad your friend took 1.0 and 2.0 home for you.  

2:45 pm - Repent for the loud sigh and rejoice (for the third time on one Sabbath!) that someone brought homemade cinnamon rolls to the meeting.  Realize you are fickle.  Consider that this is another reason you'll be Telestial Kingdoming it up.

2:46-3:45 pm - Continue repenting.  Make a note to self to not complain next time someone says there will be another 5th Sunday lesson about Missionary work.  

3:45 pm -  Race to counselor's home to grab kids.  Share a cinnamon roll with her. Yumalicious!

4:30 pm - Arrive home - make food - wish Mr. Mormon would have sinned and ordered something so you didn't have to cook.  Repent.  Revisit the idea of sending him to cooking classes.  

4:45 pm - Phone calls begin.  Field calls...

5:45 pm - Wipe sweat from ear from having plastic shoved against it so long. Be glad the problems aren't yours.

7:00 pm - Finally hang up from calls and race over to a distraught sister's home. Her mother is dying and be so glad yours isn't.  Help clean - listen - love her more.

7:55 pm - Make calls on way to 8 pm meeting.  Find out counselors cannot come to the meeting. Find out the sister who hasn't been at church in 6 weeks is possibly going to the Mayo Clinic she's so sick.  

7:57 pm - Decide not to judge those who 1. Didn't home teach Sick Sister, 2. Didn't visit teach Sick Sister, 3.  Said unkind things about why she wasn't at church on Sundays.  Continue listening to her while she explains how bad things are.  Thank Heavenly Father for your health.

8:10 pm - Finally make it into meeting after sitting in driveway for 10 minutes listening to a crying sister - make about 3,000 Visiting Teaching changes seeing as about 8 families have moved in so far this summer.

11 pm - Thank Heavenly Father for all the new families and hope that it will take the load off of folks.  

11:01 pm - Call a distraught sister back to see if she still needs me to come and help her pack.

11:01.5 pm - Be kind of glad she didn't pick up and pray she can get it all done.  

11:20 pm - Finally make it home - talk to Mr. Mormon - craft emails about the state of Sick Sister and Mother Dying Sister until midnight.

12:30 am - Crawl into bed knowing I am getting up at 4:40 am to take Mother Dying Sister's family to the airport.

4:10 am - Get woken up extra early by 2.0 and 3.0.  2.0 lost a tooth and needed an audience.  3.0 insisted she was going to be sick and only cookies would help her.

4:11 am - Smile a little knowing that one day - all of this WILL be over and be grateful for all the people who did this before me FOR me!!!! 

Don't you wish TV was better?

I thought I'd let ya know what is ahead for me this week, and that I might not be around.  Quit yer sniveling...you'll get through it.  

I'm probably no more busy than you are, but I handle it worse.

It's already Tuesday (YIKES!) and I have 2 of my newest Relief Society girlies graduating from high school today, so I need to scoot about and get flowers and goodies to them.  That will be fun!  Of course it's gymnastics day, so it'll be a tight squeeze to get it all taken care of, but I'm an expert at that.

Tomorrow is our last dance class day of the season - but more importantly - it is BOOK CLUB night! We'll be reviewing Escape (and I still contend that polygamy eerily parallels The Bachelor) and my house is a wreck!  So I must clean and make some treats for the shin dig.  I also need to figure out what time my book group is meeting.  I really must pay better attention to details.

Thursday is back to gym and a host of classmom/church responsibilities to take care of and most importantly - it's the day to get ready for our big, fat, dance recital weekend!  WOOHOOO  

I don't have the kids' costumes altered, yet (whoopsies) and it'll be one day of rehearsing and one day of recital-ing and a lot of running around and sweating. It's a veeeeeeery long production and I'm planning on moving to the Zen portion of my brain to get through it.  

On top of these small things, I still have a calling (and a sister who has to find new housing by this Sunday and she has lost her job - argh!) and working out AND I decided to do something highly religious this week.

In my copious spare time, I decided to re-read The Book of Mormon this week.  

What was I thinking?

I've felt snark-y and not very patient with people lately.  This is evidenced by my saying to someone about her disdain for her Visiting Teaching route, "We're all big girls and we can do hard things - I believe in you."

Umm, that wasn't probably the answer she was looking for.  That was evidenced by her 0_0 (deer in the headlights) face back at me.

I thought that maybe doing something like this would help me feel more peaceful and help me get things in perspective. We'll see. You don't need to tell me that a massage would also bring about peaceful feelings and hurt my eyes less than reading.  he he  

But I need to get on top of my spiritual game and I think this will help me as it has in the past. I feel a lot of pressure to always be spiritually ready for drama now.  This morning, I awoke to a 1:30 am email from a sister asking if I was awake as she needed someone to talk to.  I love her and would have been happy to talk to her at 1:30 am about whatever it is, but I was sleeping.   Anyhoo - I'm just trying to get at the point that there's never rest from the advice giving/listening ear having aspect of my life, so I need to be prepared.

In (near)  conclusion, If I'm not here, I'm probably doing something relating to any of those things - or am enjoying just the general moments  of motherhood - like grocery shopping, cleaning the dirt off the ceiling of the guest bath, or explaining puberty to 1.0 (because her friend and cousins didn't do a very thorough job.)   

Clearly, you will all be torn up over my absence.  I'd suggest watching some TV. But seeing as there are very few good shows on this week, you might be sunk.

In  that case, I'd further suggest you recall some old shows you used to love, and relive them in your heart and mind. Now THAT sounds entertaining!  Once upon a time, there were so many good shows.  Watch them again in your mind's eye...and share here what shows you miss!

The blessings of THE CALLING

I do love my calling as Relief Society President. That might not always show.  I don't always love every little bit of the job, but I love the sisters a ton and I feel like I have the capacity to be a better person when this is all said and done.

Yesterday, I was telling Mr. Mormon some of the blessings that I've noticed from doing this job.  I decided I should record them somewhere so that when it seems tough, I can reflect on some of the goodness.

A few of the many blessings

1.  I have some seriously spooky discernment right now. Well, it should probably not be called "spooky" - I guess it's more "divinely inspired." More than once, months before an event happened, I have told Mr. Mormon what I felt would take place down the road. And these were very random, out of the ordinary, no-guessing-it-in-advance types of events.  I had no reason to suspect anything wonky was about to happen with these individuals. But Heavenly Father gave me a heads up and it made me much more calm in addressing the situation.  I (hope) instead of arriving to them in a state of shock, I've been able to address these sisters in a peaceful and level-headed way.  

2.  I now seem to have more hours in my day than any other person I know. It's been wild and I've commented on it many times to Mr. Mormon - and thought I'd share it here.  In the evening, when I review my days in my head, even I am sometimes shocked by all that was done in just short periods of time.

Yesterday, I had a Presidency meeting in the morning, took 3.0 to school, and found myself with one hour and 5 minutes free, if you counted the travel time to and from the school in that. 

Here's all that I did in that time.

1.  (From the school) called Mr. Mormon to check on a time for dinner

2.  Called the C-Dawg to confirm said dinner. Chit chatted because I LOVE CHERYLYN!

3.  Went home to get my recipe book - decided on dinner.

4.  Went to Publix to buy dinner.

5.  Came home - seasoned and browned roast.

6. Put all the groceries away.

7.  Finished the roast prep

8. Tidied the downstairs and cleaned the bathroom

9.  Tackled the very destroyed post-meeting playroom.

10. Threw a load of laundry in - folded a load.

11.  Called to check in on 2 sisters 

12.  Returned some emails

13. Re-made 3.0's bed and cleaned the upstairs bathroom.

14.   Raced out the door exactly on time to get 3.0 from school.

PHEW!

Another day, I remember needing to get a food order done but only having about an hour and  a half free.  Cherylyn and I dreamed up a plan and she took 2.0 and 3.0 for me - I drove the 15 minutes to the order, talked to the sister about nutrition, made a meal plan, completed the order, and came back to Cherylyn's and was done ahead of schedule.  It's like extra minutes have been added to my day.  I couldn't be more grateful!

3.  Getting to know the sisters has been a blessing and a half. I feel like I have 70 new best friends.  I walked into a birthday party of a neighbor and there were 2 of my Relief Society homeys.  (None of us knew the others were invited.)  Someone asked how we all knew each other and one of my friends said she knew one of the gals from church and said about me, "This is one of my best friends."

Prior to this calling, this girl and I were always friendly, but in light of this calling, we've had a lot more opportunities to be together and she's shared a lot about her life and her struggles with me.  It was a complete honor and a humbling experience to be called one of her best friends.

Additionally, because of this calling, I got to fall in love with Cherylyn and her darling family.  She has been a wonderful counselor who has told me the truth when it needed to be said and has been such a good, good friend and partner in crime, I mean, righteousness.  This calling has blessed me to make friends who will strengthen me forever.

4.  Perspective. Oh boy do I have a better perspective of life and what constitutes a trial now.  I thought I knew.  Now I know.

5.  I have always loved women and what women are able to accomplish. I'm so proud to be a wife, mother, and a woman. And I'm insanely impressed with what the women in my ward are able to accomplish. 

For almost 15 days, we needed babysitting for one family while one of their children was in the hospital and we had another sister moving (with her 3 kids) who needed her home cleaned and a lot of extra help (there is no dad in the picture there.) Then there was a third girl who needed babysitting and rides to and from school for 3 days. All of that was happening at the same time!

And the women of my ward did all of that - and they did extra!  They'd babysit for someone - and then bring them dinner for that night, as well.  One woman just called up another and insisted on cleaning some of her home. These gals will regularly phone to tell me they have some extra time that week if I need anything special done for anyone. The charity and compassion and industry of women continues to amaze me!

6.  I have known peace more greatly these past few months.  I think feeling peace is something you appreciate during a trial and then, as time passes, you forget what you enjoyed.  The roller coaster that is sharing with these women offers a lot of opportunities to plead for peace and to witness it in their lives.

It has been a (huge) blessing to me to not feel stressed or overwhelmed or scared by some of these women's trials.  Those feelings would have kept me from serving most effectively.

So - those are some of the blessings I've been noticing.  I appreciate that I have such a supportive family and I am able to serve right now.  Someday, I still hope to have a BIG FAT BREAK, but right now, I can't think of any place in the ward I'd rather be.