No - that little angel is not growing in me.
One of the Young Women in the ward (aged 16, I believe) is now pregnant and unmarried. I got the call late last night that she will probably be moving into Relief Society with us now. I think, provided she will come, that everyone will be wonderful to her. She is a darling girl, really, but has been rather edgy and unkind to the other young people for some time now, and has pretty much quit coming to church for anything but the sacrament. She is still kind and good to the adults - so I think moving up to Relief Society would be a fresh start for her. And we have such a welcoming group, I think she has the potential of fitting in just fine, if she wants to.
I have so many questions on what to do! I am a big fan of adoption, but I hear she has already made the firm decision to keep the child. She might marry the father - who is not a member of our church and also in high school (the girl had dropped out of high school some time ago which was shocking as she had been an Honors student and very high achieving, but I believe now will start taking some GED classes.) Do I ask her about adoption? Do I just listen? So far on that front, the farthest I've gotten is having her (and maybe the dad) over for dinner and to talk. Or maybe lunch out with her and my Presidency? Except, ya know, we'd have all OUR kids in tow...
There is so precious little money in that home - it's just absolute poverty. I know folks will help out with the initial new-baby costs - but what then? Does she understand how expensive and time consuming and life altering this will be? Is it my job to help her see that or to just support her? Or is my job to support her, but confirm the scary realities when she finally observes them? How far do I go? Do I take her to register for baby things when she won't consider adoption or do I just call once a month and ask how she is? (Her mother is - gosh to not go into too much - just horrible to her and will not support her, I don't believe. Her father is a total pushover and a good, good man.)
Our graduating seniors just moved into Relief Society and we made a big fat deal over them their first Sunday with us...there were posters, flowers, balloons - we shared things their families wrote about them and just had a great time that day. Does she slip quietly in the back now? Do I make the same fuss? Do I treat her like a new move in and take a casserole over while I try to get to know her?
Ohh, I could go on and on with my worries for her and for how I'll support her. I'll pray for inspiration. In the mean time, if someone would like to be my inspiration at the moment, I'd be so grateful. Anyone have some real life experience dealing with this situation that you'd like to share?
