Body fluids are your friends

Usually, getting a new Bishop is fun and exciting. Unless, of course, you are the auxiliary President who most closely associates with the Bishop and you are afraid for who will be called. Our Bishop was called to the Stake Presidency and that is lovely for him and for all of us, I suppose.

But now, I'll get a greenie. Or even worse - I'll get someone who's done it before and is set in his ways and crotchety.

I heard once in an Escape class that if victims want to get away from the perp quickly, two of the most effective things they can do is to urinate on themselves or vomit. 

I already have a plan of action for my first ward council meeting.

Do I hear a double dog dare?

I might use the old puke and pee on some other folks, as well.

I think I can say I love all the women in my ward. I can't think of any I don't love, at least.

There are a few I'd like to spank, though.  :)  I have a sister I've done about 4 food orders for and she's never filled any of them.  But then she comes back weeks later asking for another.

Then there's the sister whose ideal food order for 2 people for 2 weeks included 34 pounds of meat, 24 desserts, and ohhh, about 20 pounds of flour.  She didn't love me when I told her we needed to menu plan and that this order needed an adjustment.

I was recently stormed out on and had a door slammed at me for telling someone she needed to ask the Bishop for a food order, like everyone else.  There was an interesting conversation that I had lately wherein it was determined I should personally pay for folks to drive others to the storehouse since it wouldn't be right for me to ask someone to serve another for nothing and it also wouldn't be right to ask the church to reimburse people for their gas. And finding out that sisters didn't attend RS Temple Night (they said they couldn't because they had a major athletic event the next day) and I discovered later that they went to see High School Musical 3 instead was yet another un-uplifting moment of this Presidency.

But there is plenty of good.  (Think of the good, Mama.....concentrate...concentrate....) In fact, 99% of this job is just lovely and I enjoy serving folks and being a sounding board. I am honored that women let me in their lives and share their most private issues with me so we can problem solve and help them get ahead.

I got not one but TWO lovely emails last week telling me what a great President I am. How nice is THAT? I was amazed anyone would take the time out for that and am honored anyone would think I don't suck.  Overall, there is a lot of joy and happiness to be had in this calling. 

But that's not to say I wouldn't mind puking and more-purposefully-tinkling to get out of a couple of jobs sometimes.  I'm just saying....